From tob@cwis.unomaha.edu Wed Apr 28 11:16:58 1993
Return-Path: <tob@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Received: from cwis.unomaha.edu by ccu.UManitoba.CA
	(4.1/25-eef) id AA23729; Wed, 28 Apr 93 11:16:55 CDT
Received: by cwis.unomaha.edu (5.65/DEC-Ultrix/4.3)
	id AA19808; Wed, 28 Apr 1993 11:16:51 -0500
Date: Wed, 28 Apr 1993 11:10:31 -0500 (CDT)
From: Tob Wood <tob@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Sender: Tob Wood <tob@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Reply-To: Tob Wood <tob@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Subject: I never get good mail
To: New Subscribers <cdibble@acsu.buffalo.edu>, gt6877c@prism.gatech.edu,
        umdesch4@ccu.umanitoba.ca
Cc: Kansas City Chung <echung@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Message-Id: <Pine.3.05.9304281018.A16766-c100000@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Mime-Version: 1.0
Content-Type: TEXT/PLAIN; CHARSET=US-ASCII
Status: O


Yesterday I got home from whatever it was that I was doing and I opened my
mailbox.  Actually, I opened my closet and then opened my mailbox since my
mailbox is inside my closet.  There was an envelope (pronouced ON velope)
from my paternal grandfather.  I immediatly knew what it contained, but I
opened it anyway (I open a lot of stuff in the course of a day).  Inside
was a five dollar bill (U.S.).  No note, no letter, no nothing, just five
bucks.  Cash.   He does this about once a month.  My grandfather is a pretty
cool guy.  So I bought some beer and watched TV for awhile, and then I
decided to go out to eat.  I really just drove around for about 20 minutes
and then realized I really wasn't hungry.  

_ - - _ - - _ - - _ - - _ - - _ - - _ - - _ - - _ - - _ - - _ - - _ - - _


This only happens to me:


Friday night I went down to the Old Market (a riverfront tourist trap with
lots of bars and restaurants) to sail my toy sailboat in the lake in Central
Park Mall.  The weather conditions were perfect and it just seemed like a
good idea.
    I was there for about 10 minutes, watching my boat zoom across the water,
when this guy and his girlfriend walk by.  The guy says, "How are you
controlling that?"
    "I'm not", I replied.
    "No, really, is it remote control?", he asks.
    "It's a sailboat" I said.
    "How are you controlling it?" he says.
    "I'm not.  It's a sailboat"  I say.

This goes on for about 3 more minutes.  This guy can't believe that there is
no motor on the boat.  I go into a condescending lecture mode and try to
explain to this BONEHEAD the concept of wind powered craft.  I even had to
pull the boat out of the water and show him that there was no way I was
controlling it and that it was a completely self-contained thing.

Summary:  I almost got into a fight because somebody didn't understand what
          the word `sailboat' meant.

Moral:  I really need a girlfriend so I have something better to do on
        Friday nights.



Tob
...............................................................................
:I am a clueless newbie.    More info via `finger'        tob@cwis.unomaha.edu:
:.............................................................................: