From tob@cwis.unomaha.edu Wed May  5 10:55:04 1993
Return-Path: <tob@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Received: from cwis.unomaha.edu by ccu.UManitoba.CA
	(4.1/25-eef) id AA15614; Wed, 5 May 93 10:55:01 CDT
Received: by cwis.unomaha.edu (5.65/DEC-Ultrix/4.3)
	id AA03701; Wed, 5 May 1993 10:54:55 -0500
Date: Wed, 5 May 1993 10:36:04 -0500 (CDT)
From: Tob Wood <tob@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Subject: 
To: New Subscribers <bjdorris@acs.harding.edu>, cdibble@acsu.buffalo.edu,
        gt6877c@prism.gatech.edu, umdesch4@ccu.umanitoba.ca
Message-Id: <Pine.3.05.9305051004.C507-c100000@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Mime-Version: 1.0
Content-Type: TEXT/PLAIN; charset=US-ASCII
Status: O


This is a conversation that I had moments ago with Jennifer Grimm after she
noticed that I was 'dressed up'.  I'm looking for a job.

Jen:  "Oh Tob!  You look nice!  Are you going job hunting today?"

Tob:  "Yes."

Jen:  "Hmm, where's your belt?"

Tob:  "What belt?"

Jen:  "You need a belt."

Tob:  "Why?"

Jen:  "You just do.  Now go put on a belt."

Tob:  "I don't own a belt."

Jen:  "You don't own a belt?"

Tob:  "I buy pants that fit to begin with, hence not needing a belt."

Jen:  "Tob, you don't wear a belt to keep your pants up. it's an accessory.
       Don't you know anything?"

Tob:  "Pretty soon you'll be trying to tell me that men don't wear ties to
       draw attention to their genitals.  It's a crotch-focus thing."

Jen:  "What?"

Tob:  "Sure, haven't you ever noticed where a tie points?  It's a form of
       male insecurity.  It all goes back to a primate mentality and a type
       of self-affirmation.  Wearing a tie says `I am a manly man.  See?  I
       have a penis and I am so proud of it that I'll wear this arrow around
       neck that points right to it.  Now whenever anyone looks at me, their
       eyes are drawn down to my crotch.  I am a MAN',  crotch-focus.  That's
       what it's all about."

Jen:  ... (in incredulous silence)

Tob:  "I don't own a tie.  If I want someone to look at my penis, I'll just
       pull my pants down.  Saves on a lot of subliminal and psychological
       wear and tear; I have to save my brain for other things."

Jen:  "What?...what could YOU possibly need your brain for?"

Tob:  "Oh, I don't know.  But if I think of something, I'll let you know."

Jen:  "Great, thanks.  Now go away, you're making *my* brain hurt."

Tob:  "Well, the reason your brain hurts is because of that hat you're
       wearing.  Do you know why people wear hats?  It's because they are
       trying to...."

Jen:  "SHUT UP!"

Tob:  "Okay."


  Just thought I'd share...
Tob


...............................................................................
:I am a clueless newbie.    More info via `finger'        tob@cwis.unomaha.edu:
:.............................................................................: