From tob@cwis.unomaha.edu Thu May 6 14:31:25 1993
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Date: Thu, 6 May 1993 14:26:46 -0500 (CDT)
From: Tob Wood <tob@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Sender: Tob Wood <tob@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Reply-To: Tob Wood <tob@cwis.unomaha.edu>
Subject: Mental Hygiene
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(That was a Real-Big-Screaming-At-The-Top-Of-My-Lungs `HEY!' to everybody
who've been sending me feed back; and they know who they are ! ;')
Okay! On to business! Welcome to the Tob Show!
(Dah dah dah music: Insert Here)
No, not really, but wouldn't it be great to have a talk show?
But before I go on, THIS IS A SURVEY! This survey is just going to be for
me to see who's out there...SO...fill this out and send it via email to:
Reynold, may we have the address please?
tob@cwis.unomaha.edu
Thank you Reynold! Ladies and Genitalmen, and big hand for REYNOLD!
(Clap clap clap track: Insert Here)
----------------------------Here's How To Play------------------------------
I am going to be randomly blithering (as usual) for the next few paragraphs
and every once in awhile, there will be a number in parentheses [i.e. (*1)]
and this means that the NEXT sentence is a SALIENT POINT. Please respond
to each SALIENT POINT in your own words and email the results to me, Tob, at
tob@cwis.unomaha.edu. Please respond! This can only be a success if you
participate. And if you have friends who read over your shoulder, have them
fill out the survey! I'll add 'em to the list to swell our ranks! Okay,
now remember: Respond to SALIENT POINTS! Ready? GO!
oh wait, let me rewind....
It's the Tob Show!
No, not really, but wouldn't it be great to have your own talk show? Wouldn't
it be great to be on a talk show? (*1) If you could be on any talk show in
any medium, what talk show would it be? I think I would like to be on "Later
With Bob Costas". Or on that one with Terry Gross on NPR. Either way, it
would be a blast. (Chat shows)
Okay Next:
The Mango Lhasi Recipe
I want to thank B. "Brenna The J" Dorris and Chris from ManiTOBa for
requesting this delicious recipe after I dropped the hint on everybody's
head last time. This is the cultural equivalent of our chocolate milkshake
in most of East Asia. And now.............MANGO LHASI !
Procure:
1 can mango pulp (available at Indian groceries, etc...)
any size; see below
1 thing of plain yogurt (available everywhere)
about the same size as the mango can
1 bottle rose water (available at Indian groceries and
other international markets)
Vanilla extract (or flavoring)
Ice
Blender
Okay, measure out to your best ability (or half-assed attempt, I don't
care, it's not crucial) equal amounts of mango pulp and yogurt into a
blender. Put in a drop of vanilla (or more if you're making a ton), and
about 1/4 cup rosewater. Now add about as much ice as there is mango and
yogurt. Put the lid on the blender (or don't, I don't care) and blend the
Hoo-Haa out of it. Just liquify the whole durn mess of it. When it is of
drinking consistancy, pour into tall glasses (or drink out of the blender,
I don't care) and enjoy. Some people like a pinch of nutmeg on the top, but
hey, I can't tell you what to do all the time, so it's up to you, Brave
Experimenters!
And now, The Tob Variation: For a real knock-down-drag-out-taste-
bud-orgasm, substitute pineapple ice cream for the yogurt and cut the amount
of ice in half. Blend until mixed, but don't over do it, you want a fairly
thick blend. Scoop into dessert dishes or shallow bowls and place in
freezer for 4 or more hours. Serve with guava slices and cappucino.
(*2) Doesn't this sound good? I thought so, that's why I invented it!
Somebody else suggested adding gummi bears to either of those recipes. What
ever trips your trigger man. But then again, I also invented the Crunch-
E-Slush-E, so now:
The Crunch-E-Slush-E
Go to your local 7-11 (or KwiK Shop or Shop-N-Go or whatever they have
where you are) and get a large cherry Slurpee (or whatever they call them
where you are, you know what I'm talking about; those carbonated slushes)
and a cherry/grape combo box of Nerds (that oddball Willy Wonka candy, and
if they don't have them where you are, then yer SCREWED because they are
absolutely crucial). Mix all of the grape Nerds into the Slurpee and save
the cherry nerds. Stir well. Now drink it, but not too fast or you'll
get a headache like you used to when you were a little kid. Remember that?
I do. I used to eat ice cream really fast, get a headache, and then bang
my head up against the wall to make it feel better. No kidding!
<*>-<*>-<*>-<*>
A L E R T !
<*>-<*>-<*>-<*>
I changed my .plan, finger away!
Usually I change it in the morning,
but I didn't get to it until about
6:OOpm or so, but hey, so what.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Chris from ManiTOBa, a loyal reader, wrote me a letter and wondered what
the grossest thing I'd ever eaten was. He said the grossest thing he'd ever
eaten was a worm, but he didn't clarify as to what kind of worm he ate. I
mean, was it the worm at the bottom of a bottle of tequila? Or say, maybe
a nightcrawler? Or was it one of those big fat green sickingly bulbuous
things you see on tomato plants? I think it would depend a lot on what
kind of worm it was before I could say how gross it would be to eat one.
Quite a few of these vague discrepancies tend to lessen the effect, and
therefore cannot be rated against each other. That's why I need your help
with my new concept: The Grossest Thing Ever Eaten Factor (GTEE).
The GTEE Factor will enable us to compare and constrast edible grossness
levels on a standardized scale. The GTEE scale is between 0 and 100 with
100 being the grossest possible thing. At first all ratings will seem
arbitrary due to inividual tastes, but soon we should have a fairly accurate
method. As a starting point, I offer this chart as you, at home, consider
your personally most repulsive foods (or unfoods), BUT REMEMBER !! For
the time being, stick to rating things YOU HAVE ACTUALLY EATEN.
The GTEE Factor Scale
---------------------
100 GTEE Makes you puke just thinking about it
|
|
75 Makes you puke when somebody eats it
|
|
50 Makes people puke when you eat it
|
|
25 Makes people queazy when you eat it
|
|
1.0 Makes people say, "Oh my God! You
0 ATE that?" when you eat it.
You can probably see that the way the scale is arranged, anything with
a GTEE Factor of around 60 and below is something that you would eat.
Anything rated above 60 or so would be something that even *you* wouldn't
eat. So try to take everything into consideration when rating the grossest
thing you've ever eaten. Now, I'll go first (since Chris in
ManiTOBa has to tell us what kind of worm he ate and rate it):
I geuss the grossest thing I've ever eaten would be escargot, but a lot
of people like myself like escargot, so I can only rate it at 12.4 GTEE.
But if you went up to somebody in a restaurant with a dish of escargot in
your hand and said, "Hey, wanna see me eat a snail?", it would probably
rate much higher. I have also eaten raw octopus tentacle in a sushi bar,
and I'd rate it pretty high, maybe around 36.2 GTEE, because our Western
tastes really can't deal with stuff like that. I've also eaten caviar
and pate, but they're so accepted, that they'd rate somewhat low.
I think that haggis, tripe, chitterlings and borscht are some of the
grossest foods around, and I won't even touch them. If anybody out there
has tried any of these, please rate them.
(*3) What was the grossest thing _you've_ ever eaten?
`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'
Okay, that's about it for me for right now. Fill in those surveys and
send them in! I'd also like to say that as I was writing this, I got another
request for inclusion on this list from someone who will remain anonymous
at K.S.U.! Yay! Distribution is going thru the roof!
Tob
P.S. Check out the `Bar Tip' at the end of my .plan. It really works!
...............................................................................
:I am a clueless newbie. More info via `finger' tob@cwis.unomaha.edu:
:.............................................................................:
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